11 June 2012


handmade (by me) skirt   old navy cardigan
mossimo wanda wedges   target belt & necklace

my weekend wasn't as relaxing as i usually expect my weekends to be.  sometime between saturday night & sunday morning my car was stolen.  i almost didn't flinch when i learned this.  i think i've done a good job at balancing emotion in times of crisis since i deal with it so often with my clients at my job.  homelessness, shut off utilities, hospitalizations, volatile family members... i know what i need to do (usually), questions i need to ask, and how to start to work on a plan to get through those situations with my clients.  it's still far from easy, but i think it helped me remain detached from the emotion involved in this situation that was about me.  i called the police, my insurance company, my dad.  my sister drove me around our area with hopes of finding my car abandoned in the mall parking lot or by a bus station.  i thought i could outsmart the criminal and anticipate where it might have been left, but it could be across the river for all i know or still conveniently being used for someone else's transportation.  for now, i have a rental car bill to boot and an ear attuned to my cell phone for some hopeful news that just isn't ringing.

life is so hard for not just some people... but for all of us.  i know how privileged i am with the resources & education that i have tacked on to my faith that gets me through everything, always.  but life is still hard and leads us to do things to get us through or to help us feel like we can get a little more even with the systems we have to work within/against.  sometimes i don't tell the cashier if one of the coupons i use is accidentally scanned twice and more is deduced from my total than should have been.  for someone else, it's stealing a car that is easy to unlock, is in good shape, and has a full tank of gas.  so who is the judge of our transgressions... not me.  so i'm letting this go.  and still getting dressed in outfits that i feel great in.  thanks as always for your support & visiting, it means so much to me... especially on a day like this when i need to feel connected to something that i really enjoy doing--this blog, rather than ruminating and wondering and feeling sad (and mad). 

keep holding on
all i got is holding on these roses
the thorns keep on digging but my soul believes, please

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